Ok so I pray and pray. And pray. My home is a work in progress. We save money, we do a home improvement project. We save money, we do a home improvement project. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. We have been waiting since Thanksgiving for the texture, sheet rock people to show up and do a little (insert major sarcasm here) popcorn scraping. I have a love hate relationship with the construction industry. It’s like a secret society or something with secret handshakes and code language.
As for my contractors I have cried because of them. I have spastic texted them. (yes spastic texting is a real term AND it’s an art) I have cursed, freaked, given up, gotten excited, thrown things, threaten to move out and live in a tent or van down by the river, pondered the thought of buying a Winnebago and threatened to do the projects myself in the course of this home remodeling process.
Did I mention to you that I prayed? and prayed and prayed, and lost faith and gotten faith and….. you get the picture. Frustration at its best. Did I mention to you that this has been going on for ohhhhhhhhhhh about one year. ONE. YEAR. Did you know this stuff is crazy expensive? oh you want tile you say? well let’s see tile, grout, perma whatever you call it and labor. I feel like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman when she goes into the dress store for the first time to price an outfit every time I am pricing a new project……well if you have to ask…you can’t afford it. Am I rambling? oh yes….. I am and I’m not apologizing. I want in the club with the secret handshake.
So last night I get home, my husband informs me that the general contractor was able to get a crew (finally) and oh yes they want to do 5 rooms. At the same time. Did you hear me out there? At. The. Same. Time. Well I suppose I didn’t really register the gravity of the situation due to my giddiness of the idea of moving forward with updating the house.
Then 8:30 a.m. came and with it 5 guys ready to scrape, mud, bullnose demo and spray. In 1 hour, my family (sans the oldest child-who was taking the ACT) emptied 2 bedrooms, 1 playroom, 1 utility room, one bathroom, 2 halls and 3 closets. As my frustration heightened, the piles grew and the panic began to set in, I realized that there is a lesson to be learned. I wasn’t ready. Here I am praying and praying and praying that something would happen and then BOOM. It happens.
Think about all the times in your life you have prayed, only if, I will, I promise, I won’t… and you pray and pray. And then “it” happens. Just not in the way you wanted it. But you got exactly what you asked for. Right? I think I had a moment of truth today as I was thinking how am I going to live in this house of chaos and smelly mud –
and I realize. I have gotten exactly what I have prayed for. I just wasn’t ready.
I spent the rest of the day meditating on this revelation. How many times have I prayed, and gotten down on my knees asking for something to happen and I wasn’t ready for the responsiblity that came with it? My Husband used to tell me that if I ask for a sack of potatoes I better have a shovel in my hand.
Are you ready? for whatever you are asking for? I find that honestly, I probably am not ready most of the time because being ready means accepting a greater responsibility. I don’t care what it is that you/I have asked for. It WILL require more responsibility on your part. It will require more growth, more faith, more trust, more work. You want a child? a better job? more money? better grades? a more peaceful life, a better relationship with God, lose weight, better health, better friends, mending relationships almost all of it will require more from us. I do understand that there are a few exceptions but for the most part it will require more.
I also realized in this lesson, that most of the time we are delivered to the place where we want to be. In my life, it is usually not in the manner I thought it would be. Think about all the twists and turns your life has taken and how you have arrived at your destination. You thought you were taking the plane and somehow you took the one man boat.
I laugh to myself at how much patience God has with us. How many times has this lesson been presented to me and I totally failed. Totally. So tonight as I look around my abode and see the piles and piles of mud, clothes, toys, books, dirty clothes, luggage and laundry baskets I have to remind myself I asked for it and now, 14 hours later I am ready.